soul medicine

Hormones: The Invisible Puppeteers of Our Body and Mind

We often think of our bodies as intricate systems of organs and tissues working together to keep us alive and thriving. But at the heart of this intricate system is a lesser-known yet powerful force: hormones. These tiny molecules have a hand in almost every aspect of our bodily functions, from regulating our sleep patterns to controlling our metabolism. And, just as they have the power to maintain balance and harmony, hormone imbalances can wreak havoc on our physical and mental health.

Understanding Hormones: The Basics

Generally, hormones are chemical messengers produced by the endocrine glands. They travel through the bloodstream, telling tissues and organs what to do. For example, insulin helps regulate blood sugar levels, while thyroid hormones control metabolism. And it's not just about physical functions; hormones are pivotal in influencing our mood, mental health, and overall well-being.

Imbalanced Hormones and Mental Health

A hormonal imbalance can manifest in numerous ways, from mood swings and anxiety to depression and insomnia. For instance, imbalances in serotonin, often termed the happiness hormone, can lead to feelings of sadness, irritability, and depression. Similarly, fluctuations in estrogen and progesterone, particularly during the menstrual cycle or menopause, can greatly impact mood and cognition.

For Black women, there's an added layer of complexity. Historical and systemic disparities in healthcare access, coupled with societal stresses like racism, can exacerbate hormonal imbalances. These disparities might also make Black women more susceptible to conditions like polycystic ovary syndrome (PCOS) or thyroid disorders, which can influence mental health.

Nutrition, Hormones, and Weight

One significant factor that can impact hormonal balance is diet. Consuming highly processed, sugary, or fatty foods not only influences weight but can also disrupt hormonal harmony. A diet low in essential nutrients can compromise the functions of the thyroid gland, hinder insulin regulation, and amplify stress hormones like cortisol. For Black women, specific dietary habits and cultural cuisines might need to be carefully navigated to ensure they receive hormone-balancing nutrients.

Eating for Hormonal Harmony: Tips for Women

1. Prioritize Protein: Incorporate lean protein sources like fish, poultry, legumes, and tofu into your diet. Protein provides the essential amino acids necessary for hormone production.

2. Opt for Omega-3s: Fatty acids, particularly omega-3s found in fatty fish, chia seeds, and walnuts, can help reduce inflammation and maintain cell membrane health, which is crucial for hormone function.

3. Boost Fiber Intake: Fiber helps detoxify excess hormones and regulate blood sugar levels. Sources include whole grains, fruits, and vegetables.

4. Minimize Sugar and Refined Carbs: High sugar and refined carb intake can lead to insulin resistance, which may result in weight gain and disrupt other hormonal processes.

5. Incorporate Cruciferous Vegetables: Broccoli, cauliflower, and Brussels sprouts can help balance estrogen levels.

6. Stay Hydrated: Drink enough water daily. It aids in hormone transport and overall cellular function.

7. Limit Caffeine and Alcohol: Both can disrupt endocrine functions and negatively influence hormonal balance.

Understanding the role hormones play in our health is essential for overall well-being. Especially for Black women, who may face unique challenges and vulnerabilities, prioritizing hormone health through nutrient-dense foods can be a key to unlocking a balanced mental and physical state. By taking small, proactive steps in our daily lives, we can harness the power of hormones to work for us rather than against us.

GET CURIOUS.

The GET CURIOUS framework aims to help Black women delve into the art of self-awareness. Through guided introspection, this model aids in excavating hidden emotions, identifying root causes of pain, and fostering holistic healing.

Framework Components

1. Release the Need to Be Right

Exercise: Conduct a self-assessment to identify situations where the need to be correct has hindered your growth.

Question: When faced with situations where you have to make hard decisions, ask yourself: “What is more important to me—being right or healing?”

2. Acknowledge and Name Your Emotions

Exercise: Use a feeling wheel to identify and label your feelings. See below for a link.

Question: “What is the core emotion I am feeling right now?”

3. Experience and Explore Your Emotions

Exercise: Utilize mindfulness to analyze and sit with your emotions.

Question: “Where is this emotion stemming from, and what does it signify for me?”

4. Take Your Time and Write That Shit Out

Question: “What narratives are surfacing in my journaling that need further exploration?”

5. Ask 'What' Questions

Exercise: Engage in self-inquiry using “what” as the lead word.

Question: “What factors contributed to this emotion? What can I learn from this?”

6. BEA Gracious

Exercise: Reflect on instances where you fell short, forgiving yourself and identifying ways to improve.

Question: “What can I learn from my failures to make more informed choices in the future?”

7. Practice Kaizen

Exercise: Identify one small change you can implement for self-improvement.

Question: “What is the one percent improvement I can make [in this moment, in the future]?”

8. Feel it in Your Soul, Sis

Exercise: Use guided visualization or deep reflection to ensure soul-level resolution.

Question: “Is my soul at peace with my conclusions?”

9. Ask for a Second [Third + Fourth] Opinion

Exercise: Seek input from trusted mental health accountability partners.

Question: “What alternate perspectives or insights am I missing?”

10. BEA Vulnerable

Exercise: Share your reflections and growth areas with someone you trust.

Question: “What part of my story am I hesitant to share but know is crucial for my healing?”

Additional Resources

The GET CURIOUS framework is a guide and a committed lifestyle to discovering your authentic self. Following these steps diligently will bring about self-awareness, holistic healing, and a life filled with ease and serenity.

Note: This framework is informational and should not replace professional medical advice. Always consult a healthcare provider for medical advice and treatment.

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Copyright © 2023. GET CURIOUS: What Does It Mean to Get Curious. All rights reserved.

What Are You Telling People About You?

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We teach people how to treat us by what we allow, what we stop and what we reinforce.

So, when they hurt us, it is our responsibility to teach them how to treat us. Our response to their infraction tells them what we will accept and how much we value ourselves.

It is important that when you speak up for yourself, you don’t use victim vocabulary. Victim vocabulary will only encourage them to continue their poor behavior toward you and give them permission to invite other people to do the same. You want to stand in control of your circumstances, never giving your power away to someone else. What does this look like?

It looks like you being honest with yourself, practicing mindfulness, accepting personal responsibility, evaluating your trauma, and not complaining, but seeking solutions. You want to maintain in control of your life and the outcomes.

Example: Josh has a 32 in math. He’s asked his teacher for assistance over and over and she doesn’t help him.
Victim response: She doesn’t like me. I will have to live with a F.
Empowered response: Josh emails the teacher, copying the dean of the university with details of the issue and the times he’s sought assistance. He asks for a meeting and to have the dean included in the meeting.

If Josh takes the victim role, he is teaching his math teacher to continue to ignore him. When he moves to a position of empowerment, she knows that she has to pay attention to him.

What have you taught people about how to treat you?

Use the examples in this worksheet to guide you through evaluating how your response has been teaching people to treat you.

Choice vs. Decision :: What's Your Vision For Your Life

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There is a distinction between a choice and a decision.

A choice is limited only by your creativity. A decision is made based on the available options, nothing more.

When applied to our lives, we can say that we choose our life. What we have or don’t have is only limited by what we can dream up for our lives. We then use that vision as the guide for how we make daily decisions.

If you want happiness, then choose in every situation to see the positive and be happy.

If you want financial stability, then choose to a career path that will supply you with the money and learn how to invest and save to have that.

It sounds simple - and it really is that simple.

Yes, life will come at you hard, but you have the power to determine how life impacts you. You alone are in control of achieving the vision or what you choose for your life.

“I Choose” by India.Arie drives this point home. In the song, she makes a bold declaration that she is taking full control of her life. She’s even tellin’ her momma that!

Let’s follow her lead and boldly take control of our lives by choosing the life we want.

Use this Life Vision Worksheet to help you start planning.

Need support? Schedule a free 30-minute consultation with me.

Service, Rest, Discipline

If you don't have the Iylanla Awakenings app, what are you really doing? 

Just kidding, but I couldn't help myself. Seriously, the app is amazing. I use it some mornings to get focused and help me start my day. I try to listen to it completely without my mind wandering off. If it does, I refocus or listen to it until I can focus without thinking of something that is not related to the message.

I found a recent message is worth sharing. 

You can listen to the full message below, but I want to bring intentional attention to her message about discipline + worth was powerful. To paraphrase she says :: Get your mind, body and spirit in alignment that what you are working toward is worth it. It lead me to ask you :: What in your life are you working toward is worth it?

When you think through the answer, consider her other two principles and well ::

  • Service :: This isn't service to others, but service to yourself. How is the thing that is worth it a service to you? If you can't determine how it is a service to you, what are you really doing it for?

  • Rest :: Is what is worth it allowing you to get rest? When she speaks of this, it is not about sleep (though that is super important). Rest is about being awake, still and in the moment. Listen to the full message so Iyanla can tell you how rest supports you.

Opportunity is Wealth

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Opportunities are wealth. Consider wealth in this case as more than just material or financial wealth, but wealth in health, relationships, etc. When you capitalize on opportunities that are presented to you have the ability to improve your quality of life and live out your true purpose. It is important to be mindful and present in each day and each moment so that you don't miss opportunities.

Use this worksheet below to determine if you are ready - mentally, emotionally, physically - for opportunities that may come or that you are actively seeking. Review this article on mindfulness vs. meditation. It will help you understand the difference between the two + provide resources to start you on your journey to be more mindful and present in each moment.

Opportunity is Wealth Worksheet

Meditation vs. Mindfulness

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We hear about mindfulness and meditation all the time; but, what is the difference? Are they the same? Let me break it down for you.


Mindfulness is the awareness of something, while meditation is the awareness of nothing. There are many forms of meditation

Mindfulness Meditation is a form of Clear Mind meditation that helps to do just as the name implies - clear your mind. Attention is paid to the natural rhythm of the breath while sitting, and to the rhythm of slow walking.

Mindfulness meditation is a mental training practice that teaches you to slow down racing thoughts, let go of negativity, and calm both your mind and body. Mindfulness techniques can vary, but in general, mindfulness meditation involves a breathing practice and awareness of body and mind.

You can be mindful and not meditate. This is the practice of sitting with your thoughts, asking yourself intentional questions about a situation to deepen your self-awareness, which will help you navigate difficult and triggering situations.



Mindfulness requires ::

  • Beginner’s mind :: Seeing things as a visitor in a foreign land, everything is new and curious.

  • No judgment :: Becoming impartial, without any labels of right or wrong or good or bad. Simply allowing things to be.

  • Acknowledgement :: Recognizing things as they are.

  • Being settled :: Being comfortable in the moment and content where you are.

  • Being composed :: Being equanimous and in control with compassion and insight.

  • Letting be :: Letting things be as they are with no need to change them.

  • Being self reliant :: Deciding on your own, from your own experiences, what is true or not.

  • Being self-compassionate :: Loving yourself as you are with no criticism or self-reproach.

Types of meditation ::

  • mindfulness meditation

  • spiritual meditation.

  • focused meditation.

  • movement meditation.

  • mantra meditation.

  • transcendental meditation

  • progressive relaxation.

  • loving-kindness meditation


How can these things help with stress?

  • Proactively manage stress

  • Reduce anxiety that comes from racing thoughts and projecting the future

  • Increase your self-awareness, which can improve relationships, help identify triggers and create strategies to support stress reduction and improved mental health

How + when to use them to help with stress.

Bio-individuality | Each person is different, but these are general practice rules

  • Begin your day | Center yourself and plan for your day | Help you anticipate stress of day

  • In the moment | Center yourself + stop racing thoughts and anxiety

  • Stop and ask questions to get to root cause + triggers


Sis, Get Your Money Right

The 50/30/30 rule

According to the SoulMed Holistic Health survey, stress is the number one concern of Black women around the country.

One common cause of stress if money.

No matter your income, it’s important that you know how to manage what you have.

You can start to get your finances in order by implementing the 50/30/20 rule. The basic rule is to divide up after-tax income and allocate it to spend ::

  • 50 percent needs

  • 30 percent enjoyment 

  • 20 percent savings

Get to the bag, sis!

Sometimes what you have just isn’t enough to move you forward. When that’s the case, you have to know how to get to that bag!

According to Nadia C. Vanderhall of Brands + Bands, getting to that bag is as simple as taking an inventory of your skills and using them to build a business or shift your career. To get started ask yourself the following questions ::

  • What do I do well?

  • What are business opportunities and/or careers that align with my gifts? If you don’t know or need ideas, try Google and God. Search Google for ideas and ask God for direction. Then wait on His response.

  • How can I prepare for my come up? Strengthen your knowledge by taking classes that align with your gifts. There are several free skills-based certification classes available now. Again, Google can be your best friend when finding those opportunities.

Vanderhall also shared tips for getting to the bag through investing and managing your money. One of my favorite tips from this part of the conversation was - consume what you consume. If you want to know what it means, you will have to read her blog post Bill or Buy :: Consume What You Consume.

Get more tips by watching the replay of SoulMed presents Soul Sessions :: The Financial Edition below.

Don’t miss out on the good, good. Make sure you are at Soul Sessions each week.